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 <h1>candys journal</h1>
 <h2>basically the "hidden" vent section ive seen the webtracker nobody looks at this page</h2>
 
+<article>
+	<h2>2024-11-07</h2>
+	<p>i feel like every single problem i've ever<br>
+	had in the creative space can be boiled down<br>
+	into this image:<br>
+	<img src="/personal/gomap.png"></img><br>
+	like, if i could just shut the frick up and<br>
+	"do it scared" i could get something done but<br>
+	i just have to try and force someone "successful"<br>
+	to help when i feel like im failing and<br>
+	it doesnt fix the problem of being scared to fail and<br>
+	ill eventually annoy them to the point they hate me again<br>
+	<br>
+	for creative stuff especially i feel like im falling<br>
+	into the trap of making the same kind of character, or<br>
+	like being unable to write a different perspective (or at all)<br>
+	i KNOW if I JUST SAT DOWN and WROTE i could EVENTULLY make someting PASSABLE but my STUPID BRAIN just gets PARALYZED at the SLIGHTEST HINT OF RESISTANCE and i just run to SOMEONE ELSE to GET ME TO DO IT I<br>
+	<br>
+	im sorry for all the negativity here but im trying to<br>
+	be more vulnerable here and this is how i am</p>
+</article>
 
 <article>
 	<h2>2024-11-07</h2>