diff --git a/personal/journal.html b/personal/journal.html
index 131370f..847061e 100644
--- a/personal/journal.html
+++ b/personal/journal.html
@@ -21,7 +21,21 @@ permalink: /journal
 	like just going through the motions again
 	and again
 	college will be hell but it hasnt started yet so who knows
-	wish i could just be content</p>
+	wish i could just be content
+
+
+	16:00 update GOD DAMNIT
+	can i EVER exist in a public space without
+	being anti social or making everything worse for myself?!
+
+	i really really dont unerstand the forum posting rules
+	and i keep ruining everything he probably hates me now
+	god i keep fricking everything up and the forum is going to
+	shut down in like 2 hours which is even worse because now
+	i cant even like "prove myself" at all and have to worry about
+	it the entire day tomorrow why do i make things so much worse
+	for everyone around me why do i keep trying to do this
+	</p>
 </article>
 
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