70 lines
2.6 KiB
HTML
70 lines
2.6 KiB
HTML
---
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title: vent/journal
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permalink: /journal
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---
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<a href="https://journal.miso.town/atom?url=https://abslimeware.neocities.org/journal">
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<img src="/assets/images/blinkers/rss.png" />
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RSS
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</a href><br>
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<a href="https://kiosk.nightfall.city/">
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probaby never on <img src="https://kiosk.nightfall.city/banner-kiosk.png"
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alt="The Neon Kiosk - Nightfall City">
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</a>
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<h1>candys journal</h1>
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<h2>basically the "hidden" vent section ive seen the webtracker nobody looks at this page</h2>
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<article>
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<h2>2024-11-04</h2>
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<p>back here again, i guess<br>
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being scared of things seems to be my entire driving force huh<br>
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i wish it wasnt but its the only thing that reliably motivates<br>
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me to do anything but lay around and be pathetic and waste time<br>
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scared that if i stopped doing art id never start again<br>
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or people would forget me<br>
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id just be another face, nice to talk to but gone instantly<br>
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i already tried this stupid journal thing three times and<br>
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deleted everything or gave up because it was just me whining<br>
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and being a stupid little edgy teen because my life is literally<br>
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just uni and discord/stupid frking forums and who wants to read<br>
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about that "oh i went to school it was uneventful then i went<br>
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online and talked with people about nothing like the last 500<br>
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entries" i dont know what to do<br>
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sorry for another negative entry but again barely anything<br>
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happens here</p>
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</article>
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<article>
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<h2>2024-09-30</h2>
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<p>Wow, a whole month before I tore down the<br>
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journal page again!! cool, huh??<br>
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now i get what people mean with "teenage mood swings"<br>
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i left the last article so i have something<br>
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to reference to copy this properly<br>
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these journals keep getting either<br>
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too negative or fall into disuse because<br>
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my life is incredibly boring besides like<br>
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talking about what i did online which would<br>
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make me sound like a really sad person and stuff<br>
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also my hyperfixations got me into trouble again<br>
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i really wish i could either be normal and not<br>
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obsess over real disorders people actually deal with<br>
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(DiD/pluralness) or just actually have it so i can feel<br>
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justified in being so interested and like be able to<br>
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interact with the community better and stuff and also in general<br>
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not have social anxiety and ok its getting too negative again<br>
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would it be wrong to say i want to inflict myself with it</p>
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</article>
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<article>
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<h2>2024-09-26</h2>
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<p>hey, im back its been a while<br>
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still dealing with stuff and college<br>
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idk how im feeling really</p>
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</article>
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<h2>[EXPUNGED]</h2>
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