39 lines
5.4 KiB
Markdown
39 lines
5.4 KiB
Markdown
---
|
|
title: just some other shit i've been dealing with (WN 35)
|
|
date: 2025-11-02
|
|
tags:
|
|
- week-notes
|
|
draft: false
|
|
url: week-notes/35
|
|
summary: "week notes more like month notes am i right"
|
|
---
|
|
This is an amalgamation of whatever I can remember over the last few weeks. I am almost certainly missing things, but I'm trying to reset and start up again.
|
|
## Doing
|
|
Lately I really just feel like shit. I've had a cough for going on a week and a half. According to urgent care, it's a post-viral lingering cough. I don't remember having something viral, but, well, teaching middle school means I'm exposed to all kinds of nasty shit. I'm glad to not have any other symptoms, but the cough has kept me up at night and indirectly given me a sore throat. And then, mentally, I'm going through phases. There are days where I feel totally blank, empty, detached — and then days where I feel so stressed, so angry, and completely unable to do anything about it. I took on teaching a college class this semester because I stepped back from some commitments at my full-time job and because I am at a place where I basically have my entire curriculum set for the year. Unfortunately, I am never satisfied and am constantly rebuilding and reworking entire units, and I have an incredibly challenging group this year in terms of behaviors. I feel like my heart just isn't in it this year — or, it is, but it's being beaten out every day by the horseshit I'm dealing with. I'm drowning in grading (especially for the college class — I'm *weeks* behind). I stay for hours after school and it feels like I hardly make a dent. I keep telling myself that things will get better, but it's hard to see that light at the end of the tunnel.
|
|
|
|
I have gone deeper into the world of fountain pens. I bought a LAMY Safari and Pilot Kakuno, both in extra fine; I like both but prefer the Kakuno (as it's slightly thinner). I also bought a converter for my Preppy, but I don't think I'm using it right — I feel like I'm hardly pulling any ink. I might just try refilling cartridges with a syringe.
|
|
|
|
## Reading
|
|
I finished *Accountable* by Dashka Slater because the deadline was up for the book group I joined. I enjoyed reading and discussing it, and it's upsetting how relevant it is to my school and experiences with today's students. The events at Albany are in no way an anomaly. I wish perhaps that the book offered solutions, but that's also naive of me — there are no easy answers to dismantling the effects of systemic racism and the dehumanizing vitriol teens encounter online.
|
|
|
|
I've read maybe ten pages in *Villette* in the last few weeks. I am really enjoying it and want to read on, but it's been impossible to find the time and energy for it.
|
|
|
|
## Watching
|
|
I'm still watching *Weeds*; I'm practically done with it now. The later seasons aren't as bad as I remember, but they have nothing on the Agrestic seasons. They not *good*, but they're watchable, and that's enough for me right now.
|
|
|
|
Joe and I watched *Survivor 42* and are in the middle of *46* as part of our prep for *Survivor 50*. I liked *42* more than I expected (Dreya is Queen); *46* is a rewatch for me, but a good one — I love a season with goofy chaos like this.
|
|
|
|
Joe and I also spent Halloween re-watching *Fellowship of the Ring*, though we both fell asleep somewhere around the Council of Elrond.
|
|
|
|
## Playing
|
|
I've played a few more hours of *Final Fantasy Tactics* over the last few weeks. I'm still positive on it, but I'm missing the diversity of *Tactics Advance* — I liked having the different races in my clan, but *Tactics* seems limited to just humans.
|
|
|
|
## Listening
|
|
I listened to *Sound & Color* by Alabama Shakes on a friend's recommendation. Surprisingly, I was able to place "This Feeling" from hearing it on *Fleabag*; otherwise, I found the album a little too coffee shop jam band to care much about it. I liked "Drive By Baby," though.
|
|
|
|
The re-release of Mac Miller's *GO:OD AM* dropped for real this time, so I listened to those three bonus tracks. I'd been listening to the leaked version of "Carpe Diem" for years at this point, so I'm glad to at last have that out officially. It's a goofy song that I have a lot of affection for, and I don't think it (or the other two bonus tracks, which I think are bad) really fit tacked onto the end of *GO:OD AM* — the album has such an intentional build and ending, and then it's surprise! Here are two songs that probably didn't need to be released and one that could have been on a leaks EP or something.
|
|
|
|
There was a time in my life when I was listening to all the Mac leaks and keeping up as more dropped, but nowadays, I've deleted all of them save for a few I really care about. Part of that has been enabled by the family [releasing official versions of some that I do really like, of course](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dS7rnvWOJrE). I suppose I'm just holding on in hopes that the five or so[^1] that I hang onto drop officially. This is unlikely, however, because one of them was on the leaked *Balloonerism* but didn't make it to the official release. There's also "The Sun Room" (which eventually just became "The Star Room"), which probably would have been included on the re-release of *WMWTSO* if it was going to be anywhere. Consider this my requiem for an official drop of "Pure," I guess, and then I can move on with my life.
|
|
|
|
[^1]: I'd give links to them but they pop up and then get copyright striked pretty quickly — and also they're inherently controversial. Clearly I have some mixed feelings on them.
|